I'm running in circles around myself... I need the memories... I want the memories... I live for those fleeting flashbacks throughout my day... but at what point will they bring a warm smile to my face and not a rush of tears? It still hurts so much that he's gone.
Tonight I find myself replaying this video... over... and over... and over... again. It's of the two of us in a motel room in the middle of nowhere Idaho... we could create a memory anywhere...
I'm so glad that, for once, I didn't listen to him and delete the video... it's the only recording of his infectious laughter that I have... the most cherished 17 seconds of my night.
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