Happy Birthday Waddles...

Dear Waddles,

If you were here, you'd turn 40 today. The big 4-0. You'd insist nothing be done or said about it. And you would know me well enough to know that I don't take no for an answer. Especially when it comes to celebrating you. And boy could I celebrate you. I miss shopping for December. Your birthday is separate from Christmas. I never cared what you said... you were worthy of two different days and gifts for both.

James Glenn Durgan (December 19, 1970 ~ July 10, 2008)

I've had this list going of things I've wanted to share about you for awhile. I put it aside for a bit. Picked it up. Put it down. A really rough work in progress. Still a work in progress. It seems fitting to share it now. In honor of what would be your 40th. You'd shake your head at me right now. Laugh. Make a joke to divert the attention from you. You were never one for the spotlight (well sober you weren't one for the spotlight :*) So, Babe, here's to you. In honor of your 40th birthday... forty things about you that I love and cherish... and still hold close to my heart.

FORTY THINGS FOR JIM'S FORTIETH BIRTHDAY

 

1. First of all, Jim was a real, live, breathing person who loved deeply and unconditionally.
2. JIM LOVED HIS CHILDREN. Equally.
3. Jim was the best father I have ever met.
4. Jim was gentle.
5. Jim was caring.
6. Jim was the ultimate listener.
7. Jim was the best friend a person could ask for.
8. Jim enjoyed hunting… anything…
9. Jim enjoyed taking ARD shooting… targets… squirrels… rodents… if it moved it likely wasn’t safe.
10. Jim enjoyed taking ARD and ECD on the bike paths and biking around town with them.
11. Jim loved getting out and about and being active.
12. Jim enjoyed fly fishing.
13. Jim loved taking the kids fishing.
14. Jim enjoyed a simple walk. Long walk. Short walk. It didn't matter as long as he got out.
15. Jim loved taking the kids camping.  He had several spots picked out for the summer.
16. Jim LOVED ice cream almost as much as he loved his kids… and the flavor didn’t matter… as long as it was ice cream.
17. Jim also LOVED pizza… he could eat pizza three meals a day for a month and be content. The all you can eat buffet pizza joints were put to the test when he was in town.
18. Jim enjoyed watching Beth swim and take an active role in her swim meets. He was excited that her time was only FOUR seconds off of the Jr. Olympic times.
19. Jim enjoyed going to ECD’s swim meets as much as he enjoyed watching her. He cherished the special time that the swim meet weekends enabled him to have with ECD and ARD.
20. Jim loved to huggle.  (In layman’s terms… snuggle/cuddle). (God, how I miss those hugs).
21. Jim was notorious for being the comic relief. 
22. Jim loved, loved, loved to give you the finger poke... and usually only he thought it was funny... 
23. Jim loved his scotch. The quickest way to his good side was to buy him a bottle as a present.
24. Jim also loved his beers. I can count on one hand the number of times I saw him drink the same beer more than twice. He loved the beer tour at that famous restaurant ;)
25. Jim had the biggest heart. He'd do anything for most anyone. Even if they had hurt him in the past.
26. Jim was quick to forgive and nearly as quick to forget. 
27. Jim was so very humble. He was so intelligent and so sexy and had it all but half the time he walked around without even recognizing it. 
28. Jim was easily embarrassed... and was absolutely adorable when he would blush.
29. Jim could walk into a room full of strangers and leave with 20 new friends.
30. Jim was an amazing lover.
31. Jim was the most patient man I've ever met.
32. Jim had (and still has) the best sense of humor of anyone I know. 
33. Jim loved to save money. He was a saver. I know, it's contrary to the mess he left behind, but realize that there were more fingers in that pot than just his.
34. Jim has the strangest luck. We would joke that if it weren't for bad luck he wouldn't have any luck at all. We called it the "Durgan Luck." Seems like if there was a way for it to happen... it would.
35. Jim really enjoyed his adult cartoons. South Park. Futurama. Those Japanese shorts. Spongebob. Don't ask. You're better off not understanding ;)
36. Jim also enjoyed literature. Not just reading. He'd find books on tapes to keep him entertained on long rides.
37. Jim was good at making the tough decisions in life. He had a way of looking at all sides of the situation. 
38. Jim kicked ass at dominoes. He could play online for hours. Unless there was a good "favor" on the line he was relentless and could beat me 98% of the time.
39. Jim loved playing poker. He was a very strategic thinking person and in his element at the tables.
40. Jim loved life. He had so much more to give us.

Dirty Gulch Road. 

County Road 12, Fremont County, Colorado

"I let the day go by

I always say goodbye

I watch the stars from my window sill

The whole world is moving and I'm standing still"

I miss you Waddles. Every day. Every minute. Every breath. I can't believe I'd ever have to say it, but I miss hearing, "fuck a duck." I miss your laughter. Your love. Your charm. Your kisses. Your embrace.

I'd give anything to give you a birthday kiss. To hold your hand. To hear your voice. To see that funny little freckle of yours just one more time. Even though, one more time would never be enough.

I love you.

Forever and always,
~ me*